“when it came to odd, Miss Treason didn’t just take the cake, but a packet of biscuits too, with sprinkle on top, and also a candle..”
“.. change the story, even if you don’t mean to, and the story changes you..”
— Terry Pratchett, Wintersmith
After she left I settled down to read more of The Wintersmith, when it jumped out at me – boffo! Boffo.. the strength one gains by behaving exactly as one expects you to.. of course, I thought. Miss Treason uses props to affect how she is perceived by the villagers.. this eases her task and she is taken much more seriously. Tiffany, having discovered her secret, calls Miss Treason out on it.. this is where we learn all about perceptions. There is no polite way around it, peoples’ perceptions of us (and us of them, to be fair) color our interactions. We fear how people perceive us. Do we soften how we wish to be seen? Do we adjust ourselves for the comfort of others? Do we tuck away parts of ourselves that we aren’t quite comfortable with? And to what extent are we willing to give up these pieces of ourselves? Or, do we own who we are in our path? How much will we allow fear to hold us back? Is there a middle ground and at what point is this compromise for the sake of better acceptance helpful and when does it become a hindrance to our path? I can only answer that for myself.. and you for yourself.. and so on it goes. For me personally, I strive to own it. Yeah, to say the least, Miss Treason had me on the fence.
Sometime later I set the cards on the altar. I lit all the candles I had about and set my spirit incense to smoking. I settled into the flame to contemplate what the cards were saying. There was something buried a bit.. I could feel it. It was almost like a physical thing, like I could almost reach in and yank it out.. but at what cost? This happens from time to time and I must always ask.. at what cost? Then of course one has to deal with the knowing, and sometimes the pretending that you don’t once you do.. its all very tiring. Still, there was something dwelling in there that needed an out and that is why I gave her the cards to shuffle. I asked the spirits to show me the truth of it.. Show me, show me.. I needed that heart of things, that truth which was dwelling deep. See.. we all have our truths, just like we have our decisions.. all of which shape our pathways. Some of these are conscious and some are not so much.. some need the light, and some are best left in shadow. There was fear.. that fear of perception.. this I knew, we had just had that conversation. Show me, I said a bit more firmly. A seedling of doubt emerged.. Is this what I am? How do I know? How will I be viewed? Do I want to be seen? Is this all that I am? Will there be more? I want it now.. but I don’t. Do I want this? I don’t know.. you must decide for yourself.. which path.. and then you must decide of it how much you want to own it.. assuming they give you a choice. There are no rights or wrongs here. There are just your truths to do with what you see fit.