I had intended to take a step back and move inward a bit, putting aside my usual spiritual and trying to make peace in my mundane.. cycles and all that. My plan to immerse myself in the day to day, it turned out yet again, just wasn’t going to work out right the yet.
It started with the finding of the sparrow.. a heavy heart and minding our burdens. Then there was the familiar empty knock on the door and the whisperings.. followed by a shadowy visitor late one evening in semi-dreamland, that not quite asleep liminal space. Hello there hooded figure, I’ve heard about you.. you’ve been keeping company past with friends of mine, and no.. I don’t think I want to play. She seemed amused.
Later, I started slowly working my way back to spiritual in small ways.. less time consuming that didn’t pull me away so much. I left offerings for all the little ones in the garden and spent some quality time with the plantlings. I smudged the altar and worked with the cards, which I had set aside. This year the altar hasn’t changed much, which is not the usual. I have been drying the few roses still blooming for future graveyard visits. I plan to go to the woods as soon as I am able.
I think I am liking this forming idea of working a quieter presence. I am pondering more on what it means to serve – not for glory or livelihood, not for teaching or leading, or any of those other such things one sometimes should aspire to (and somehow I just never do).. but for the simple answering of the call.. and how I want to fit my pieces together going forward.. small things, but important things.